Lifestyle Changes During Pregnancy

     Growing up I always assumed being pregnant just gave you a "glowing" reflection, beautiful hair, and an adorable baby belly. I guessed that all the lifestyle changes came after you finally got to bring your bundle of joy home. Little did I know, but soon came to realize, the changes in your lifestyle start the day you find out you are pregnant. Sure you can still do some if not all the things the things you like, but there is a list of do's and don'ts added on to your daily life. For instance, as soon as I found out I was pregnant I set my goal to quitting what I knew would be the toughest challenge for me; smoking.
     As we all know, smoking is one of the biggest don'ts while you are pregnant. Smoking can lead to a variety of complications and upsets during and after your pregnancy such as:

• spontaneous abortions
• ectopic pregnancies
• other birth and delivery problems
• fetal brain damage 
• growth retardation/low birth weight
• lower or higher than normal infant blood pressure  
• problems requiring neonatal intensive care
• infant death from perinatal disorders
• sudden infant death syndrome
• mental retardation
• respiratory disorders during childhood
• Attention Deficit Disorder
• other learning and developmental problems
• behavioral problems, violence, and criminality
• smoking during adolescence
• various adult health problems
• cancer-causing agents in infants’ blood: potentially carcinogenic mutations; and childhood leukemia

List is provided by the Colorado Department of Public Heath and Environment
(http://www.cdphe.state.co.us)

I've been a smoker for around three years straight and the thought of quitting anytime in my near future never came to mind. But finding out around the end of November that I was already a couple weeks into my pregnancy, I decided my New Year's resolution would be to quit smoking. It was a lot harder then I thought and though I didn't reach my goal quitting date, I knew I had to for the baby. What really helped, I believe, is that I was never really into drinking alcohol so the only thing I had to focus on was my smoking. But now only did I have to quit smoking, I had to start eating a lot better then I was.
     I never watched my weight well or what I was eating on a regular basis. I ate what I wanted when I wanted and if I didn't like it, I didn't eat it. Thought not obese I am overweight and have had diabetes scares due to family genetics and my love of sugar. So after finding out I was pregnant I knew I had to change my daily diet drastically which meant no more Mountain Dew and more apples. Fortunately I've been chugging down water like a fish and I've never liked coffee and have never been a big fan of chocolate so the little to no caffeine issue wasn't an issue at all. Though I do love apples, grapes, watermelon, peas, and salad, I still find it hard for me to get all my daily fruits and veggies in. I'm not big on either, especially vegetables. But thankfully they have plenty of foods and drinks that have a some if not a full serving of fruits, vegetables, or both already in them so that has helped a lot. There is also the list of food that I'm not allowed to eat, however, that sometimes happens to get in the way. The other day I was asked if I wanted a sandwich but unfortunately I'm not allowed to eat uncooked lunch meat. Honey is out of the question as well as tuna fish. The whole diet thing is a hassle sometimes but its not only good for me, its good for the baby as well. Sometimes I just forget what I can't have. But the big thing I happen to forget sometimes that I have to take on a daily basis is my prenatal vitamin.
     I'm not used to taking a daily pill and every so often it happens to slip my mind. Or it slips my mind until late in the day that I find myself taking my pill around 12 a.m. or later! Plus I've had a problem with the dogs taking my bottle off the table and eating all my vitamins. You may be thinking that taking a pill isn't a problem and I agree to a certain extent that no, it really isn't but remembering to take them is. Plus I have to make sure my stomach is full or else I get an upset stomach. Which in my case can be a hassle. You would think that after taking them every day for a month you'd remember it easily, but in my case I can take them for a month and forget to take them just one day and its like I have to start all over again.
     Other lifestyle changes are not being able to pick up objects over 20 lbs which gets in the way especially working in a kitchen. You wouldn't believe how light 20 lbs actually is. Finding and buying clothes that fit in this awkward starting to get a belly stage. Going to the doctor every month and towards the end going every week. Watching my weight to make sure I don't gain too much too fast. Worrying everyday if I'm doing everything right and if I'm not making the wrong choices. Not being able to go and do everything I was able to do before. And last but not least making sure I get my doctors recommended 20 minutes of exercise a day.
     So basically your life doesn't just change once you bring the baby home. It changes the moment you find out that in 9 months you'll be bringing a baby home. Though some changes are harder then others in the end its all worth is for the baby and you'll most likely feel better then ever as well if you follow everything! As my doctor likes to say "Labor is a marathon so better start training now."  -By Nicole Shaffer

Punishing a Teenager By Bev Gayman

Discipline is a very important part of raising a teenager. It is so easy to say "your grounded" or give your son or daughter a punishment for a certain act. The hard part, or should I say "the key" is fallowing through with the punishment. I know as a mother, it's hard to say no, but the truth is when you give in to them you give them control.

Being on my third teenager, you would think I would have this teen rebelling, or whatever you want to call it, down pat. It is not possible. They are all different and respond to different kinds of punishments. My two older sons were not as rough as my youngest. This is probably, in part, my fault. I love all three of them with all my heart, but the baby is always the baby. I did let him get away with a little more.

One thing I have learned about raising a teenager is you have to set boundaries, and/or rules. Teens, actually kids in general like rules. They will never admit it, but they do. They like them even more when they help establish them. For instance, my thirteen year old loves video games. We sat down and made a list of the house rules. Then we went over the consequences if the rules are not fallowed. So, he knows if he gets in trouble in school, or breaks a rule, he loses his video game time for 3-5 days, depending on the severity of the rule.

I also learned not to be too harsh. If you take something away, don't take it for a long period of time. This is especially true with young kids and young teens. When I take James (my 13 Y/O) video game away for 3 days or even 5 days, it give him something to look forward to, a reason to behave in a good manner. Whereas if I take it for a month, oh my, that's a lifetime to him and he rebels. His response is "I'm never getting it back anyway".

It is not always an easy call on whether to punish your child or tell them "no", I try to pick my battles. Grades is on our list now, they were never an issue in the past. James went into the high school this year, the Jr High part, but still a big change in his life. His grades have dropped. I remember going into high school, it's a big transition, a whole different world. It is hard for me to punish him for this because of that reason. We worked out a plan, he picks up his homework sheet everyday after school and I help him with as much as I can. I got to be honest though, sometimes his homework is a little difficult for me.

Anyway, I believe you should pick your battles, but don't let them think they have control.

Stick with your punishment, all the way. If you question yourself, there are tons of websites that help and support you, Parent Further.com is a great place to talk to other parents who have the same questions and problems that you have.

A Personal Experience of a Common Cold

A Personal Experience: The Differences of a Common Cold in a Toddler vs. a Newborn

Ariyanna Renae

Aniyla Rae

By Alison Pawlikowsky

        
Having two children around the same age is very challenging. Every day I wake up wondering how my day is going to turn out whether it’s going to be smooth or total chaos. I would like to share my experience of having two children with a common cold and the differences of effects it has on a toddler vs. a newborn. I have a very high strung 14 month old who will always keep you on your toes. I wouldn’t call her “bad” but very ornery. She constantly has to be watched as do almost all 14 month olds. She is constantly getting into things and very spoiled. She always has to get her way or it’s a problem. I also have a 8 week old newborn who as well is very “needy”. She has GERD or in common terms Acid Reflux. She constantly spits up and screams for no apparent reason, something along the lines of how a baby with colic would behave. It’s not her fault and since I’ve already dealt with it my first daughter, the second time around isn’t so bad.

         My first daughter, Aniyla, was first diagnosed with an ear infection while I was pregnant with my second. Being pregnant and having a very sick and teething toddler isn’t pleasant. In fact, it was probally one of the hardest things to deal with. Being at the end of your pregnancy and having a 1 year old crawling all over you and only wanting her mother is very uncomfortable. I had to fight my tiredness and morning sickness every day and care for her. But I wouldn’t really call that the worst part. My daughter finally got over her ear infection and had a runny nose for a couple of weeks. Around the time I had my second daughter, Ariyanna, my first came down with a very bad cold. There was no antibiotic to help so it was kind of one of those “make the best of it” situations. I thought she was getting better but then I realized everyone around her was getting sick with a cold but it didn’t really faze me of how it can affect a newborn. I never saw a newborn with a cold. Ariyanna was throwing up so I just figured it was her formula so I switched her to a Similac AR formula, which is a formula to help babies who spit up a lot. The first day she was on it she was fine. The next day she started projectile vomiting and I noticed she was sneezing a lot. I figured she was having similar symptoms as my other daughter and that she would get over it just as she did. I failed to realize how hard it hits a newborn. My daughter Ariyanna came down with a fever of 101.3. When a newborn has a temperature over 100.4 that’s an automatic “go to the emergency room” sign as I would call it. If you are unable to get a hold of your child’s pediatrician or it is after hours, always go to the Emergency room. Never take any chances with a child so young. Immediately I knew it was time to go after she was not keeping anything down, running a fever, and just plain miserable. She was surrounded by sick people and was having a hard time fighting it. I was worried something could happen to her but I didn’t realize she was as sick as she really was. Ariyanna was admitted to Children’s Hospital with a virus known as RSV, Respiratory Syncytial Virus. RSV is known as a common cold in adult’s but it newborns it takes over their respiratory system and causes serious symptoms such as shortness of breath, vomiting, fever, congestion, runny nose and diarrhea. These are a few symptoms that are common but can lead to aspiration, pneumonia, hospitalization and even death. Once I found out how seriously sick she was it was heart breaking. I blamed myself for letting my first born pass a cold to my newborn. Ariyanna was hospitalized for almost 2 weeks. She was on oxygen and had a IV. It was heartbreaking seeing my 1 month old with needles in her arms and an oxygen tube in her nose. It was even harder the fact that one of her parents had to be with her at the hospital at all times since I had a not so sick but still sick child at home. Their father and I had to work together and travel back and forth a couple of times a day for one of us to always be there. Ariyanna eventually started to slowly get better, her symptoms started to diminish and she was finally released.

         The point of me sharing this experience is to inform my readers how different a simple cold can be in children not that far away in age. It doesn’t hit a toddler as bad as a newborn. As a mother you don’t always have the answer for everything and just because you already have children, not everything is the same with every child. I was amazed to see my one year old fine with a cold but my newborn not being able to fight it at all. In fact, I’ve never saw a baby that young with a cold at all but after It was all done and over with, I did my research to find out that is just as serious as pneumonia in a newborn. I would like to advise all mother’s to never underestimate anything when it comes to your children and to never relate anything to what one of your children has been through, not everything is the same in children.

The Balancing Act

           It is no surprise that many new single mothers struggle with finding time to just breathe. Having a child is a HUGE change and whether you notice it or not, a child will alter your entire life. Not to say this is a bad thing, sometimes we need to change, and a child no matter what the circumstances are, is a gift. While pregnant its hard to imagine what life with a child is going to be like. Our minds tend not to look too far ahead, and instead stay in the present. I remember being in high school and not even being able to visualize myself in college. I could not even fathom the idea of having a baby while still in school. Of course, life doesn’t always go as planned but the good thing is our plans are not set in stone, we can always adjust.

            There used to be so many reasons why a single mother should not continue her education, but nowadays so many women are having children at young ages, they are becoming a large part of the college population. Without a father for the child in the picture, it can be overwhelming to think about ‘doing it on your own.’ I think of it as a blessing. Not that I recommend being a single mother, of course the ideal situation would be to have a husband first. But when something in your life goes awry, it’s a lot easier to get through if you think of the positives. You will find this attitude will help you get through work/school/and coming home to your children everyday.

If you are a single mother and not receiving child support of any kind (like myself) the idea of working full-time while going to school AND having a small child seems impossible. But save yourself the stress, nothing is impossible. When you are looking for a job, try to find one that is within your chosen career path. This will keep you from getting bored and may even have an advantage on your studies by giving you a general knowledge of the career you are pursuing. Depending on your financial needs, you may need to work full-time. This is doable. I find it easier to make my school schedule each semester and then let my boss know if my availability has changed. Talk to your boss about what it is you are trying to accomplish. Many employers will work with you, but you need to remember they too have a job to perform. When scheduling your classes, try to get them bulked into just a day or two each week. Since most full-time positions will require you to work no less than 40 hours a week, you need to make sure you are not going to be requesting too much time off, in order to keep your full-time status. For example, I have reserved Mondays and Thursdays for school. In this time, I can study and get my homework done so the rest of the week can be a little less stressful.

Now that your school and work schedules are synced, lets add to the equation, a child. If you are working full-time (even without going to school) I guarantee you will need some sort of childcare for your little one. To find one that is right for you and your child you’ll need to do some research, and ask other mothers where they send their children while they work. Don’t be afraid to ask for qualifications from the workers, you need to be comfortable with the people you are leaving your child with. Also, it’s a good idea to find out the schedule for holidays and closings from the daycare provider so you can let your employer know ahead of time. Keep in mind though, daycare can be expensive. If you find yourself struggling to just pay for the daycare each week, you may need to look into Child Care Assistance.

Next, you need to make sure you have time for your child. This is the absolute most important aspect of the balancing act. This is why it is so important to get your school work done on the days you have reserved. That way, you’re not trying to study and do homework every time your child is home. If you do need some extra study time, be sure to include your child. Take frequent breaks in between studying to play and reassure him/her that he/she is not being ignored. And of course, when your child takes a nap, that’s when you get your ‘time to breathe.’ Keeping your child on a schedule will keep both of you on an even keel. Over-tired children get cranky and are almost impossible to handle. Making sure your little one gets his/her naps will give you a chance to reset the day.

This seems like a lot of information, but the best advice I can give to any single mother is to just relax. There are going to be times when you’re on the edge and you feel like you’re going to snap. These are the times when you need to stop what you’re doing, and remember what your purpose is. That child depends on you alone. Continuing your education is the best choice for both of you; do not think of this as a selfish act. A better education means a better career, and making sure that child will want for nothing.

COMING SOON!

The Operation Parenthood blog posts will officially begin on February 21, we look forward to your feedback!